XY: Beginnings
by i scribble too
Summary: Pre-Taito. Taichi and Yamato seem like typical young brothers. But while Taichi is well-loved and well-adjusted, Yamato's innocence is slowly being taken from him, bit by bit. Prologue to XY. Rated: M. Child abuse and sibling abuse.
1. April 1994

My external HDD failed – the one with all my writing (and other important stuff). Whilst I wait to see if the data can be recovered – hopefully, otherwise I will be very sad – I'm bored with a working internal HDD that has basically nothing on it but programs . . . like Corel WordPerfect.

Well, at least I can waste time by writing another story. Yay! :D

Actually, this is a prologue to **XY**. I've always wanted to write flashbacks in XY, but that would disturb the flow of the story and make it clunky. I already think XY is clunky enough as it is with the "memories". But I can't help adoring – and wanting to write – chibi Taichi and chibi Yamato interacting as brothers. XD

Thus we have this! :D

It's not _necessary_ to read XY or vice versa, but I guess it would help. **XY** – horrific sibling abuse and ultimately sexual relations between Taichi and Yamato. **XY: Beginnings** – innocent Taichi and Yamato with "lesser" child/sibling abuse. There's also no sexual abuse – yet.

This is set in 1994, ten years prior to XY – at least, this chapter is. This might be a one-shot, or I might add chapters up until Taichi turns on Yamato, or until their father dies . . . but don't worry, XY 5 will come out before any future chapters (let's hope I don't have to rewrite what I've already written, otherwise it'll be a lot longer until its release). :p

* * *

**XY: Beginnings**_  
chapter one_

* * *

"Taichiii," Yamato whined from the doorway of their bedroom. "I want cookies."

"Well get them yourself," Taichi returned in irritation, distracted. He was attempting to transform a Gundam figure a friend had given him for his seventh birthday – which was actually in a couple of days, so said friend had given it to him early.

Yamato watched as Taichi's tongue poked out of the side of his mouth as he concentrated on his toy. He stayed idling in the doorway a little while longer, until it was clear his brother wasn't going to get the cookies for him. He scowled and left to the kitchen by himself.

The cookie jar was atop the kitchen counter, but was too high for him to reach, so he pulled a chair over and climbed on top of it. He steadied himself then carefully reached out and grasped the desired glass object, before opening it up – which took a while with his small hands – and reaching a hand into the jar. He had just grabbed hold of a cookie, when the appearance of his eldest brother made him freeze.

"What are you doing?" Hideki asked. His tone was never friendly with Yamato and, quite frankly, Yamato was scared of him. He was so big and tall – even taller than their father – and made Yamato feel a lot tinier than he actually was. To be fair, though, Hideki was almost eleven years older than him.

"I'm hungry," Yamato replied quietly, but dropped the cookie back down and retrieved his empty hand from the jar anyway. Then he told a _little_ lie, "Taichi said I could have some." Well, Taichi had just told him to get them himself – but that was _kind of _permission, right?

"And is Taichi the boss?" Hideki asked, voice steady, yet always laced with intimidation. He crossed his arms over his chest. "It's dinner soon. No snacks at this time of the evening."

Yamato diverted his eyes and looked down at his hands, then began to climb down off of the chair. "I'm sorry . . ." he murmured, head low.

Then Taichi entered the kitchen. "What's for dinner?" he asked Hideki. His easy tone was certainly a contrast to the way Yamato spoke with their eldest brother.

"What do you care? Stuff that you're going to eat regardless of what it is," Hideki replied, ruffling Taichi's hair. He chuckled as Taichi knocked his hand away in irritation.

Taichi looked over at Yamato standing next to the chair directly below the jar of cookies. He wasn't stupid; he knew from the scene what had transpired. "Hideki, give me some cookies," he commanded.

Hideki snorted at Taichi's bossy tone. But he wasn't stupid either; Taichi obviously wanted them for Yamato – only this wasn't a situation where he'd normally say 'no' to Taichi. He reached over and took a cookie out of the jar. "You can have one."

"I want two," Taichi told him pointedly, sounding like a spoiled child.

"_One_," Hideki returned firmly. Hopefully Taichi would eat it himself and not give it to Yamato. Sometimes he did wish Taichi would grow up faster, because he was obviously still too young to fully understand what Yamato's existence had done to their family – otherwise he'd stop being silly and hate Yamato, too.

"Fine," Taichi grumbled, accepting the cookie. He looked over at Yamato. "Let's go play with my Gundam."

Yamato nodded eagerly for an excuse to leave Hideki's presence. Taichi turned around and walked out of the kitchen, and Yamato made to follow him – only to be stopped when heavy hands fell upon his shoulders.

"If I find cookie crumbs anywhere on you, your face is going to meet my fist, you understand?" Hideki threatened in a low voice. It was just for show and to keep Yamato on his toes, really. He didn't yet feel like he could beat a barely six-year-old into a bloody pulp.

Yamato nodded his head furiously, and Hideki pushed him forward onto the ground, where he got up quickly and scampered away. Hideki watched him go with a smirk, then turned to prepare dinner.

Yamato nearly crashed into Taichi in the hallway, who had been there waiting for him and had heard what Hideki had said. Taichi still didn't really get why Hideki – and Toru and Eito – bullied Yamato so much. Well, he knew it was because of their mother . . . but it wasn't like it was Yamato's fault she hadn't liked him. Right?

"Here," Taichi said, pressing the large chocolate chip cookie into Yamato's hands. "You're such a baby. You made Hideki mad 'cause of a _cookie_."

Yamato frowned at him a little. "But . . . he didn't have to _get_ mad . . ." he returned uncertainly, voice just above a whisper in case someone – namely Hideki – heard him. "And I'm _not_ a baby."

"You are," Taichi snorted. "_Baby_." He received an annoyed look in return. "Ooh," he said mockingly. "Look it's pissed off _baby_ Yamato." He let out a laugh, then ran.

Yamato chased after him into their room. Sometimes Taichi annoyed him greatly. But, tracing the cookie in his hands, he really was glad to have him as a brother. And not just for the cookie.

* * *

After dinner, all six occupants of the Yagami household sat around the living room watching a movie. Yamato sat in-between their father's legs on the couch, whilst Taichi sat next to them. Hideki, Toru and Eito were sprawled out on the floor; Hideki was reading an issue of Men's Health, whilst Toru and Eito were arm wrestling – with Eito losing every time, unsurprisingly.

Yamato leaned back against his father's embrace. It gave him a sense of security – that is, when his father _wasn't_ being not-very-nice to him. He liked it because it made him feel kind of special; their father didn't normally embrace the others like he did him. Taichi told him it was because he was a baby and so liked being treated as one – but he chose to ignore him.

"Daddy," Yamato said, as the movie they were watching went to a commercial break. He pointed at the screen. "Can you buy me that, please?"

Toru guffawed when he glanced at the screen. He gently nudged Hideki with his foot, who had been too engrossed in his magazine to listen in on anything. "Look what the little turd wants – an _Easy-Bake Oven_." Toru resumed laughing, with Eito joining in.

Hideki looked up from his reading material and looked at the screen, then back towards the occupants of the couch with a snigger. "Dad? Say something."

Susumu looked half-asleep or half-bored; maybe both. "You're not a little girl, are you Yamato?"

"No . . ." Yamato trailed off, not liking their responses. He regretted asking for it.

"It's for girls, Yamato," Taichi inputted from the side, rolling his eyes. Jeez, maybe the others would like him more if he didn't act like such a girl sometimes.

"But I always watch that man on TV cook," Yamato couldn't help arguing. "And he's not a girl."

"Little boys don't play with ovens, Yamato," Susumu told him, voice monotone. "Little girls do."

Yamato folded his arms defensively, feeling attacked. "But Hideki cooks all the time. Is he a girl?"

He thought it was an innocent question – but realised it wasn't, a little too late. Toru and Eito were both looking at Hideki with slight smirks on their faces, waiting for him to erupt. And he did.

Hideki was off the floor in a flash, his left hand lifting Yamato up into the air by the front of his shirt, and his right hand clenching around Yamato's crotch. Susumu barely seemed to notice that Hideki had snatched Yamato away from him – or barely seemed to care.

"Who's the girl?" Hideki growled, gripping his hand tighter around the blond's genitals. Yamato let out a high-pitched cry. "Who's the girl?" Hideki repeated, so close Yamato could feel his breath on his skin.

"N-not y-y-you-uu . . ." Yamato managed to let out next to whimpered sounds of anguish.

Taichi cringed from his seat on the couch. "Hideki, let him go. He's not gonna be able to pee –" That made Toru and Eito burst into laughter. Taichi threw them dirty looks.

"Who's the girl?" Hideki repeated coldly, ignoring Taichi.

". . . M-me-ee . . .?" Yamato asked, letting out another cry as Hideki squeezed his crotch once more, before letting go of him completely. Yamato dropped onto the floor like a sack of potatoes.

"Aahhh . . ." Yamato said at the impact, with one hand over his groin.

Taichi just looked helplessly at Yamato laying there on the floor, whimpering. Somehow, it just didn't feel right to help him up or anything – not with their father and brothers not caring . . .

"Toru, get me a beer," Susumu's voice cut through the air amidst Yamato's soft cries. Toru got up and disappeared into the kitchen to do as told. "Hideki, give Taichi and Yamato a bath, then put them to bed. Eito too, if he wants."

"I can bathe myself," Eito retorted. "Dad, I'm eight. Nine, this year."

"Such a big man," Hideki sniggered, receiving a kick to the legs by Eito. He picked Yamato up from the ground, holding him against his frame, and Yamato wrapped himself around him. "Taichi, come on," he motioned for him to follow.

Taichi got up and trailed behind. Yamato was looking down at him with a slightly reddish face. He looked sad – well, duh. Taichi would have to console him later – away from Hideki.

"Take your clothes off," Hideki instructed as they entered the bathroom. He placed Yamato down on his feet on the tiled floor, and plugged up the bathtub. Running hot and cold water as Taichi and Yamato stripped, he added bubble bath liquid, then turned the taps off. "OK, in," he lifted Yamato up and into the tub, whilst Taichi climbed in himself.

"What are you getting me for my birthday?" Taichi asked Hideki. He always tried to forget things that happened to Yamato as quickly as possible; like brushing them over made it easier to think less of. "You are getting me something, right?" he frowned.

Hideki chuckled, crouching down and putting some bubbles on Taichi's head. "Of course, sport. I just got another job, so I can get you something a little pricey, too."

"Cool," Taichi returned with a grin. Hideki placed some bubbles onto his nose.

_What about me?_ Yamato couldn't help thinking. His sixth birthday had passed almost a month ago and all he'd gotten was a 'happy birthday' from Taichi, and one from their father as an afterthought. Yamato had to admit he got a little jealous of his brother sometimes – that's when he'd get all moody and maybe have a few arguments with him.

Hideki got up and walked to the toilet to urinate. Taichi waved his hands in front of him in the water to clear away the bubbles, then looked at his own penis.

"Hideki?" Taichi asked, intrigued. "Is mine gonna get as big as yours?"

Hideki laughed. "Yeah."

"Cool," Taichi smirked, then glanced at Yamato. "What about him?"

Hideki snorted. "Yeah, him too. Unfortunately."

"Really?" Taichi questioned, using his fingers to flick Yamato's penis under the water. "But it's so tiny."

"You shut up," Yamato told him with a sour face, pushing his hand away.

"_Hey_," Hideki warned him, in what he took as disrespect towards Taichi.

"Sorry," Yamato said automatically, lowering his eyes. He idly played with the bubbles around him for a while as Hideki and Taichi conversed, but then grabbed some rubber ducks from the side of the tub and placed them in the water. He always wanted to be included, and there was no safer time to talk to Hideki than when Taichi was there too, so when his brothers' conversation came to a lull, he announced, "This is Mr and Mrs Ducky, and this is their baby. But what's his name, can you guess?"

". . . Baby Ducky?" Hideki replied, eyebrow raised. Taichi looked amused.

Yamato's mouth formed an 'o'."How'd you know?"

Hideki dunked him under the water. If it had been Taichi who had said it, he might've thought it was cute.

* * *

"Taichi?" Yamato's voice spoke through the darkness.

"Go to sleep."

Yamato frowned, shifting on his bed. "But I still don't get the oven thing . . ."

"Drop it. Dad's not gonna get it for you, so forget about it."

"But I want it," Yamato complained. "I can help Hideki cook dinner and stuff, then maybe he'll like me . . ."

"He's never gonna like you."

That made Yamato grow silent.

Taichi sighed after a while. He knew he was too blunt sometimes, but sometimes Yamato was too sensitive. "I didn't mean it." _Though it's probably true_.

He didn't hear anything in return, but soon found that Yamato had made his way across to him when his bed shifted a little at the added weight, and sure enough a warm body pressed up against him. He naturally placed an arm around Yamato's body when the blond attached himself to him. They lay in silence for a while, and Taichi finally thought Yamato had gone to sleep – when his voice cut through the air.

"Taichi, your mummy went to heaven because she didn't like me?"

Taichi rolled his eyes. "Yeah."

"Is my mummy in heaven, too?"

"I don't think so . . . she went somewhere else, I think."

"Because she didn't like me?"

"I don't know."

". . . If she still likes me, maybe she can come back and we can share her. She can be my mummy and your mummy. Like how we share Daddy."

". . . I guess," Taichi replied half-heartedly. He didn't think it was that easy – and if he were to have a mother, he'd want his _own_. "Yamato, go to sleep."

Yamato snuggled closer to Taichi – if that were possible.

* * *

Taichi held onto Hideki's hand with his right hand, and Yamato's hand with his left, as they walked to school. Hideki was walking them all – Toru and Eito included, of course – to their elementary school, en route to his own high school. Well, he'd actually have to double back to his own high school, since the establishments forked off in different directions at a certain junction.

"Eito, keep on the left side _away_ from the road, will you?" Hideki admonished sternly. Why did he have such little brats for brothers?

"There aren't even that many cars," Eito muttered, but nevertheless did as told. Toru pushed him a little, and the two began a small shoving battle. Hideki watched them in exasperation.

They continued walking for a little while longer until Toru grabbed Eito and careened him over to the right side, where he teetered on the edge of the footpath.

"Toru!" Hideki yelled, letting go of Taichi's hand to grab hold of Eito.

"You worry too much," Toru returned, a smirk on his face.

"I just don't want to waste my time by scraping any of you off the side of the road," Hideki replied dryly, pushing Eito to the left side of the footpath. "Stop it, OK?" He got tongues stuck out at him in return.

Yamato squeezed Taichi's palm in the meantime. "Your shoelaces aren't tied," he whispered.

Taichi looked at him, then down at his shoes. He was right. "At least I have shoelaces, velcro boy," he returned a little spitefully, letting go of Yamato's hand to bend down and tie his shoes. Hideki noticed and knelt down to help him.

Yamato nudged the toe of said velcro shoes into the ground as he waited for them to finish. It wasn't his fault no one taught him how to tie shoelaces. (Plus he liked his velcro shoes; they had Spider-Man on them.) Eito had taught Taichi, and Taichi . . . well, he wasn't very good at teaching things. And no one else had bothered. But then, he had only started kindergarten less than two weeks ago – and wasn't yet used to all the walking.

"My feet hurt," he said quietly, when Hideki got back up from Taichi's feet.

"What do you want me to do about it?" Hideki asked offhandedly. His tone had shifted from that of which he used on the others – it was certainly quite a change.

Yamato shrugged his shoulders a little, uncertain. "Carry me? Please . . ."

Toru and Eito snorted, and Hideki stared Yamato down, as if contemplating whether he could be fucked to say something mean, or just do as Yamato wanted. After a pause, he chose the latter; they'd get to the school quicker without Yamato's short legs slowing them down, anyway.

For a split second Yamato thought Hideki was going to hit him, until he felt himself being lifted into the air and pressed against Hideki's muscled torso. He smiled as he wrapped himself around his eldest brother, who grabbed hold of Taichi's hand again and started walking. Yamato looked down at Taichi and gave him a victorious smirk.

Taichi rolled his eyes.

* * *

Taichi normally spent recess and lunch out on the grassy field, to eat his food and play soccer with his friends, so it wasn't often he saw Yamato. But he'd just gone to the boys' toilets when, walking up some stairs to the asphalt, he saw some kid knock Yamato's pie _right from his hands_ and onto the ground.

He charged at the boy.

"What'd you do that for?" he asked angrily, pushing the younger boy a little as a warning. But then he felt someone tugging at his shirt.

"Taichi, leave it . . ." Yamato said quietly, looking worried.

Taichi looked at Yamato, but then shook him off, turning back around to the other kid and catching him off-guard with a direct punch to the gut. The kid stumbled and fell to the ground – only to have Taichi hammer his face a few times with his fist.

Yamato backed away a little; he didn't like violence, and even though the biggest kid in his class had been bullying him since practically the first day of school, he didn't want Taichi to beat him up. He knew all too well how much it hurt.

"You don't pick on my little brother, you got that?" Taichi threatened, kicking the kid who was now down full-body on the ground. He couldn't stop his father or brothers from picking on Yamato, but he sure as hell could stop some shitty little kid. He picked up Yamato's ruined pie off the ground – which was still hot – and smashed it into the boy's face, who cried out in pain. "Do it again and I'll _gouge your eyes out_."

And then, "Young man!" a teacher's voice interrupted.

_Crap_.

* * *

Taichi and Yamato sat next to each other in the school's office as the teacher – Miss Matsumoto – took care of the injured boy, first. Taichi was in a foul mood, while Yamato had been silent the whole time, a worried expression on his face. It was just like Yamato to be scared of "authorities"; Taichi couldn't care less.

"You're not gonna get into trouble," Taichi told him, "so don't worry."

Yamato looked at him, but his expression didn't lessen. "Maybe not from them . . . but what about Daddy?"

Oh. Taichi hadn't thought of that; he'd been so fired up over that stupid kid that negative repercussions escaped his mind. But Yamato was right. "Don't worry," he lied, "I won't tell him. So as long as you don't either, he won't know."

"The teacher will tell him," Yamato replied dubiously, crestfallen.

Taichi didn't know how to counter that. "Don't worry," he repeated, at a loss. "It'll be fine." But then he changed the subject – and his tone. "You should've told me that kid was picking on you from the start, though. Then he wouldn't have done what he did and I wouldn't have had to beat him up."

Yamato gave him a sour look in return at the blame. "But I told you not to! And I can take care of him –"

"Yeah, letting him continue to pick on you is 'taking care of him'," Taichi retorted, shaking his head. "All you're good at is crying."

"Take that back!" Yamato yelled at him. "Hideki and Toru and Eito said that I should deal with things on my own, and learn to put up with things by myself; that when I do, I won't be so weak anymore. Then maybe they'll like me, like they like you." He didn't want Taichi's help because he wanted to prove to the others that he could take care of himself.

Taichi snorted. "They just say that as an excuse for when they hurt you. Get it? They're telling you to put up with them and to not cry when they hurt you, dumbarse."

"No . . ." Yamato disagreed, not wanting to believe him. He had a chance to change himself into someone the others would actually like – why was Taichi trying to take that away from him? He looked at the brunet with upset eyes before turning away. "I don't like you anymore," he told him quietly.

Taichi just rolled his eyes.

* * *

Taichi and Yamato didn't utter a word to Hideki about Taichi's fight when he picked them up from school. However, when Hideki picked up the phone an hour after school had ended, they both sat up on the couch attentively.

"My father's . . . busy," Hideki said into the phone. Well, if 'busy' was him being in his room, either dead asleep from alcohol or currently consuming alcohol. "But I'll pass the message on."

"_Well, OK. I'm Miss Matsumoto, a teacher from Odaiba Elementary. I couldn't reach your father during school hours, so I hope it's OK that I'm calling during this time?"_

"No worries," Hideki replied, turning around to glance at Taichi and Yamato on the couch. He put the phone on speaker, so that the boys could hear; he was pretty sure it was about them and not Toru or Eito, what with the way they were perched on the edge of their seats.

"_Excellent. It's about your brothers, Taichi and Yamato?"_

Hideki shook his head at them at the confirmation. "Yes?"

"_Taichi attacked a boy, Ueda Tomohisa, for dropping Yamato's lunch at school today. The boy is fine, thank goodness, but he did have quite a few injuries to his face and stomach. I even heard Taichi threaten to _gauge _the poor boy's eyes out – I certainly don't know how a first grader could learn such threats."_

"Not from home, I can assure you of that," Hideki replied – a lie. He'd overheard Toru say it to Yamato a few times; Taichi must've overheard, too. "I'm really sorry, I'll make sure to let my father know. He'll have a firm word with Taichi." _And an even firmer word with Yamato_.

"_Thank you. Well, we've decided a three-day suspension for Taichi would be appropriate. Tomorrow's a Friday, so he can continue the suspension onto next Monday and Tuesday, and resume school the following Wednesday. An apology to both Tomohisa and his parents would be appreciated too, of course."_

"Of course," Hideki agreed. He then finished off the phone call in a few short minutes – something about Yamato and his teacher's expressed concern over his lack of sociability – and turned to Taichi and Yamato. "Dad's room, now."

They both got up obediently, and Yamato made an instinctive grab for Taichi's hand. Despite their earlier argument at school, Taichi didn't disallow him the comfort; after all, he was going to get out of this unharmed – Yamato wasn't. They followed Hideki to their father's room, holding hands.

It only took a minute for Hideki to inform their father of the details upon their arrival.

Susumu's eyes narrowed at Taichi. "_Great_, I have another Toru. Do I _need_ two Torus, Taichi? Hmm, do I?" Toru easily got into the most fights out of all of them.

"No," Taichi replied, keeping eye contact with their father. "I'm sorry, Dad. I won't do it again." Automatic lines copied from Toru.

"Yeah," their father nodded, taking a swig of whatever the hell he was drinking. "Think you're a big man, do you? Turning _seven_. Maybe I shouldn't reward you on your birthday, huh?"

Taichi frowned. "That's not fair Dad, you never do that to Toru."

"Toru doesn't get into fights two days before his birthday," Susumu returned. Taichi's frown deepened, and he looked at Hideki for help.

"Dad, he was just protecting Yamato," Hideki spoke up in Taichi's defence. "It's not his fault; if Yamato wasn't such an annoyance, Taichi wouldn't have gotten involved."

"Hmm," Susumu murmured, then turned his gaze onto Yamato, who shrunk back a little. "Hideki, Taichi – leave."

Taichi was glad that was the end of it for him, but now he was concerned over Yamato. He didn't want to leave, but obviously he couldn't stay; his dad wanted him out, and Hideki was already ushering him towards the door. He couldn't do anything if he stayed, anyway. He glanced one last time at Yamato's small frightened face, before Hideki closed the door to their father's bedroom.

Inside the room, Susumu was staring intently at his youngest, while Yamato squirmed under his steel gaze. "You like getting your brothers into trouble, do you?" he asked in a calm voice.

Yamato shook his head. "No, sir." He always dropped 'Daddy' for 'sir' when he knew he was in trouble. His father had told him to a while back – beaten him for calling him 'Daddy' at an inappropriate time, once.

"Taichi's been suspended for three days. That's going to stay on his school record, Yamato," Susumu informed him. Yamato didn't know what to say. "Your fault, right?" he asked. When Yamato didn't reply, Susumu asked again – only in an angrier tone. "Your fault, _right_?"

Yamato half-shrugged helplessly, looking down at the floor instead of at his father. He wanted to say 'no', that it _wasn't_ his fault – but obviously his father was expecting a positive answer.

"Of course it's your fault!" Susumu roared at him. Yamato wanted to cover his ears, but instead stood as obediently still as he could, so as not to further anger his father. "Why did you get Taichi involved, leaving a blemish on his school record? You can fight your own fights, can't you boy?"

"I didn't . . ." Yamato began, in the tiniest voice. He forced himself to look up at his father. "I didn't _make_ him . . ."

A hard, forceful slap landed across his left cheek. He brought a hand up over his face in shock, until the pain impacted and he crumbled a second later – tiny drops of tears squeezed out of the corners of his eyes.

Susumu leaned forward onto the edge of his bed so that he was directly in front of Yamato. He grabbed both his son's wrists together, securing them with his left hand, before sneering into his face. "Tell the truth, Yamato."

"I-it was . . . m-my f-fault . . ." Yamato replied obediently, voice laced with tears. He looked down at his increasingly hurt wrists as his father tightened his grip. Then, what he should have expected – another strike to the face. This time his father had brought a closed fist down hard onto his left eye socket, also simultaneously letting go of his wrists, so that his hands were now free to cover his hurt eye.

"That's what happens when you're bad, Yamato," Susumu told him in a frighteningly calm, cold voice. He then ripped Yamato's hands away from his injured eye and struck him again on almost the same spot.

Yamato cried out and fell to the ground this time. "Daddy – s-sir, stop . . . please . . ."

Susumu struck him once more on the ground with a kick, before diverting his gaze towards his television screen, apparently bored with hurting his son. He reached for his remote control and turned the volume up. Yamato was left curled into a ball on the ground before his feet, soft cries drowned out by the sound of the television.

Finally, after half an hour, Susumu acknowledged his hurt son by lifting him up into his bed with him. Yamato sniffled a little as his father brushed his hair back away from his face, and inspected the bruise left on his eye. Well, it was more like a merger of two bruises – and they were more swollen lumps than bruises.

Susumu kissed his swollen eye softly. "You're going to miss school tomorrow," he murmured, running a hand through Yamato's blond locks. He pressed Yamato's face into his chest, and smelled his hair. "I only hurt you because I love you," Susumu whispered. "You know that, right son?"

Yamato whimpered lightly, nodding his head and wrapping his arms around his father's torso. He didn't really understand – why didn't his father hurt the others? – but he liked his father like this, telling him he loved him. He only wished he was like this all the time . . .

* * *

The next day, Taichi was of course absent from school because he was suspended. But it was already midday and Yamato _still_ wasn't speaking to him; though the blond didn't have to tell him why _he_ was absent today – the shiner of his left eye was telling enough. Taichi cringed a little as he glanced at it again.

Yamato hadn't returned from their father's room at all the afternoon or evening before; he'd ended up sleeping in there, which was what usually happened after a beating by their father. Taichi had always found that a little odd, but Yamato had told him he liked it – something about their father being really nice to him then.

Whatever.

Taichi knew he wouldn't be so quick to forgive a man who made an eye close shut. OK – he was being a little bitter towards Yamato, what with his moodiness and silent treatment and all. He knew it was his fault Yamato had been hit, and he understood why Yamato was angry – but he just didn't . . . care?

No, he cared. He _did_. He just thought Yamato should get over it and forgive him, too. After all, he'd had his best interest in mind. He had _protected_ him from that dumb kid – Yamato could've at least _thanked_ him for it.

Taichi then watched as Yamato got up from his bed and made his way to the foot of _his_ bed, where he kept his toys and stuff in a wooden box. Taichi sat up in his bed a little. "What are you doing in my stuff for?" he asked, a little annoyed.

Yamato didn't reply.

Taichi rolled his eyes; the idiot was still keeping up the silent charade whilst looking through _his_ stuff. He got up out of bed to approach Yamato and see what he was doing. Yamato spread himself out in the space between their beds, laying down on his stomach with a packet of crayons in one hand, and a few sheets of paper in the other.

_Drawing_. Taichi shrugged, rolled his eyes, then plopped down next to Yamato. He took a sheet from the blond, who apparently just didn't want to speak to him so much that he let it go without so much as a glare. Taichi snorted a little; he _could_ get used to Yamato not whining all the time.

They drew in silence for a while until Taichi needed the green crayon – which Yamato was taking _ages_ with to colour in grass. He decided he'd waited long enough for it.

"Yamato," he said, "give me the green."

Yamato glanced at him, but then simply resumed colouring in with it.

"Yamato," Taichi repeated in a commanding tone, "give me the green _now_."

When Yamato didn't obey, Taichi reached a hand out and grabbed his right wrist, tightening his hold to loosen Yamato's grip on the crayon. He then used his left hand to pry Yamato's fingers open manually.

"Hey!" Yamato cried out, as Taichi tore the crayon out of his hand. "That's not fair!"

"Oh, you're speaking to me now?" Taichi asked, shooting him a cold look.

Yamato glared at him in return, which he held until it was pretty obvious he wasn't doing any damage; Taichi was ignoring him and using the green crayon to his heart's content. He made an irritated noise, then grabbed the blue crayon to colour in the sky instead. But apparently Taichi was just intent on annoying him.

"Give me that, too," Taichi told him. "I need it."

"You're using the green," Yamato replied crabbily, defusing his silent war on Taichi.

"Yeah, but I need the blue, too. At the same time," Taichi informed, reaching a hand out towards him.

"No!" Yamato shouted, rolling away from Taichi.

"_Yes_," Taichi demanded, voice stone. "Or do you want _two_ blind eyes?"

He _did_ regret saying that a little as Yamato's open eye expressed hurt.

"It's mine, Taichi," Yamato whined quietly, stamping his foot a little. "I'm using it."

"No." Taichi never liked to lose. "It's _my_ crayon so hand it over."

"No –"

But Yamato was silenced when their bedroom door opened, and Hideki stepped in.

"Hey," Taichi greeted, a little confused. "Shouldn't you be at school?"

"Lunch break," Hideki returned, sitting down onto the floor. "I sometimes come by to check on Dad anyway, to see that he's functional, or at least . . ." _Alive_. "But anyway, since you're absent today I thought I'd check up on you, too."

"We're fine," Taichi replied, even though he'd noted the singular in Hideki's speech; he obviously wasn't there for Yamato. "We're just drawing . . ." He glanced over at Yamato, and looked at the blue crayon clamped in his right hand.

"Is something wrong?" Hideki asked, glancing from Taichi to Yamato. An evil eye was aimed at the latter.

Yamato – very reluctantly – shuffled back over to Taichi, and slowly handed him the blue crayon.

"Nope, like I said, we're fine," Taichi told him, as he secured the blue crayon in his hand.

Yamato gave him a subdued look; he hated it when Taichi used dirty tactics. It didn't just annoy him, but reminded him of how much his elder brothers preferred Taichi over him. It really wasn't the best feeling in the world; unfortunately, it was something he felt often.

Taichi went back to working on his drawing, so Hideki took a crayon and a sheet of paper, and began doodling on it, too. He soon noticed that Yamato was watching him draw, sitting there with his arms around his knees, looking glum. It struck him again – as it always did – how much Yamato looked like _that_ woman; the woman who had the nerve to knock on their door six years ago, the woman who had the audacity to shove her misdeeds with their father into their mother's face, the woman who had made his entire _fucking_ world crumble.

Looking at Yamato always made his blood boil.

Their eyes, especially, were the same; he almost wanted to finish what their father had started, and force Yamato's other eye shut, too.

_Get a grip, Hideki, he's just a kid_.

He really didn't think he hated anyone more than that woman.

Well, perhaps her child.

It was much easier to tolerate Yamato when he was sad, upset, miserable. It was kind of a comfort to him, really; the fact that _that_ woman had wanted Yamato to grow up amongst his 'brothers', all smiley and happy – and he just wasn't going to get that.

Hideki was sure as hell going to make fucking sure of that.

* * *

"Give me some," Taichi told Toru when he found his brother in the kitchen getting ice-cream for himself. It was a pretty hot afternoon.

"Get me a bowl then," Toru returned, placing another scoop of vanilla ice-cream into his own bowl. Taichi opened a cupboard and did as instructed, grabbing a bowl and handing it to his brother. "Say stop," Toru told him, beginning to fill it up with ice-cream.

Yamato wandered past then and, seeing the tub of ice-cream out, stopped and entered the kitchen, too. Toru and Taichi glanced at him, but neither acknowledged him.

"Stop," Taichi said after a moment, and Toru did as told, handing him his bowl of ice-cream.

Yamato looked over at the cupboard Taichi had left open, and proceeded towards it, grabbing a bowl for himself. He approached Toru and lifted his bowl up towards him. "Toru, I want some ice-cream too, please," he said politely.

Toru snorted, looking down at him condescendingly. "Too bad."

Yamato bit his lip. "But Taichi –"

"You're not Taichi," Toru retorted flatly, turning away to put the lid back on the tub of ice-cream.

That did sting. Yamato slowly lowered his arm, then looked over at Taichi, who stared back at him impassively. Normally, Taichi would at least speak up for him . . . Yamato found himself reaching up to wipe a tear from his eye.

"Shit, you're crying over ice-cream . . ." Toru shook his head in amusement, placing the ice-cream back in the freezer.

But it was much more than that to Yamato.

* * *

At night, Taichi snuck into Hideki's room to snoop for his birthday present. His birthday was only a day away, so he'd find out tomorrow what he was getting, but a friend of Hideki's had just come over, and so said brother was busy entertaining in the living room.

A perfect opportunity to snoop, thought Taichi – only he hadn't counted on Hideki and his friend heading to Hideki's room (which maybe he should've, to be honest). He quickly dove under the bed as he heard their voices approaching.

"You could dump your lame jobs and just make a lot of cash by renting your li'l bro out – the blond one, I mean," Taichi heard the voice of Hideki's friend say. "And he's a good-looking kid – despite what your dad did to him."

"Dude, he's six," Taichi heard Hideki return.

"Yeah, but he's cute. There are tonnes of pedos out there man, they'd pay big bucks for him. And I just got a job at GB – I could probably set something up there."

"Nah," Hideki declined, skeptical. "I'm not interested in going _there_, man . . . it's just not something I want to be looking into. Plus, the old man would never allow it."

"You sure? There's _a tonne _of cash in it, man."

"He's still just a baby, Yuya."

"OK, OK. Well, the offer's always open – hit me up if you ever change your mind."

Taichi tuned them out as their conversation turned to other things. He was puzzled; what did renting Yamato out mean? Was it like letting someone . . . _borrow_ him for a day, like a video rental? That sounded weird . . . but, well, if it helped clear up Hideki's timetable so that he didn't have to work so much or so hard all the time – well . . . maybe it was a good thing, then?

And at this point, he wouldn't exactly mind if Yamato were given to someone else to deal with for a day or something. He made a mental note to bring it up with Hideki later.

* * *

Taichi woke up early for once on a Saturday. The reason? His birthday, of course.

He'd actually first opened his eyes when it was still dark, but forced himself to try and go back to sleep until everyone else woke up. At the first ray of sunshine, though, he found that his body was just too excited to stay asleep any longer. He sat up in bed with a huge grin on his face – which then faltered a little as his eyes landed on Yamato, who was across the room in his own bed.

He got out of bed and approached Yamato, who was still asleep. He observed that Yamato did look really cute when sleeping (ignoring his damaged eye). He kind of wondered how their father and brothers could hurt Yamato after seeing him sleep – he himself was already feeling bad for being not even half as mean to Yamato as they often were. Should he even disturb Yamato?

He poked Yamato gently in the face; his desire for someone to celebrate his birthday with him winning out. "I'm seven – wake up and say 'happy birthday' to me." Yamato stirred a little, letting out a few sleepy groans and slapping once at Taichi's hand. "That wasn't a 'happy birthday'," Taichi told him with another poke to the face.

Yamato gave a long groan this time, before both his eyes opened and blinked rapidly in succession, due to the new day's light. By now the swelling of his left eye had gone down, leaving some bruising around the surrounding area instead.

"Come on," Taichi said impatiently, "sing 'happy birthday' to me or something."

Yamato finally seemed to be fully conscious as he looked at Taichi – before abruptly turning his back on the brunet.

The thought of hitting Yamato actually flashed across Taichi's mind. He shook his head, then headed towards their bedroom door – he had to get out of there before he did something he'd later regret.

* * *

"Hey, Eito, let's play catch –" Toru stopped mid-sentence as he opened Eito's bedroom door to find him with Yamato. He lifted an eyebrow. "What are you doing?"

Eito shrugged. "Playing a game."

"_Guess Who?_," Yamato piped up, supplying the name of the game.

"I didn't ask you," Toru returned coldly. He flicked nicer eyes onto Eito. "What are you doing playing with him?"

Eito shrugged again. "I dunno. Passing time?"

Toru snorted a little, walking into the room and placing the football in his hands onto Eito's bed. "Having fun?" he asked sarcastically, sitting down next to his younger brothers on the floor.

"Of course not," Eito grinned at him, and the two shared a laugh.

Yamato pouted a little. "Yes you were," he said quietly, as though he didn't actually want them to hear. He didn't like how Eito played with Toru all the time now. Before, he didn't used to so much – he used to play with _him_ and Taichi all the time. And he was a lot nicer back then.

Toru reached a hand out towards Yamato and ran a hand through his hair – before grabbing hold of his bangs and pulling, hard. He laughed as Yamato cried out in pain.

"You're mean," Yamato told him, holding the front of his head.

"_You're mean_," Toru mimicked in a baby voice, letting out a laugh. His face then turned serious. "Now get lost before I _really_ hurt you."

Yamato turned hurt eyes towards Eito, who looked back at him with no emotions or sympathy. He really didn't like the new Eito. He slowly got up and headed towards the door – with the back of his mind hoping that Taichi wasn't going to turn into the new Eito.

* * *

Taichi felt like he was on top of the world on his father's shoulders as they rode the elevator to their apartment floor. He'd just spent several hours with his father at an _actual_ soccer match in an _actual_ soccer stadium that his father had purchased tickets to for the occasion. He'd thought he'd only get to see matches on TV, so he was ecstatic – and his favourite team had won: 3-1.

He'd gotten a new soccer ball from Yamato (purchased by their father, of course); a remote controlled car from Eito (ditto on their father purchasing); a new soccer uniform of aforementioned favourite team from Toru (he claimed to have used his allowance, with _some _help from Hideki); and a Super Nintendo Entertainment System complete with controllers and games from Hideki.

It had been one awesome, _awesome_ birthday.

His father helped him onto the ground when they reached their destination. "We'll have to do this again sometime," Susumu said, as they walked the short distance to their apartment door.

"Yeah, totally," Taichi replied, eyes still shining with excitement as his father unlocked the door.

As soon as it was open he ran in past his father to tell Yamato or Hideki – he didn't care which – about the soccer match, and how much cooler it was to witness in person. Toru and Eito ragged on him all the time about soccer, so he knew they wouldn't care – but Yamato always listened, and Hideki did too, just because he was an attentive and awesome big brother like that. It did hit him that Yamato was still angry at him, but he didn't care – not at the moment.

"Yamato?" he called, running into the living room. Empty. Huh; Hideki was supposed to be babysitting the others. "Hideki?" he shouted, running into the hallway. He then ran towards Hideki's room and knocked on the door. "Hideki?" he repeated, twisting the doorknob. It opened, and he found his three older brothers sitting on Hideki's bed playing cards.

"Hey, sport. Did you have a good time?" Hideki enquired with a smile.

Taichi nodded, but now his mind just wondered where Yamato was. And so he asked, "Where's Yamato?"

"In the laundry room," Toru let out a snort, giving Taichi a smirk. "You should go check on him. He might be crying himself to death."

Taichi frowned a little, and turned on his heels and out of the room. He headed into the kitchen and towards the laundry room, and as he got closer to the door, he could make out faint, erratic banging noises. He quickened his pace and approached the door, twisting it open.

There, beyond the door and directly in his line of vision, was Yamato – banging his little fists against the inside of the dryer.

Taichi immediately stepped forward and opened it, helping Yamato – face red from crying, and cheeks streaked with half-dried tears – out and up onto his feet. Yamato clung onto him like a second skin, as if their fight was forgotten.

"What did you do?" Taichi asked softly, wrapping his arms around Yamato's small, quivering frame. He obviously must've been really scared and claustrophobic in the small, confined space.

"Nothing," Yamato sniffled. "I didn't do anything . . ."

"You existed," a new voice said. Toru was leaning against the doorframe. "And we were bored and thought it'd be fun to watch you panic – and no doubt burst into tears – in the dryer. You didn't disappoint."

Taichi disentangled himself from Yamato a little, just so he could turn and look at Toru. He gave him the best evil eye he could muster. "You shouldn't have done that," he told him, point blank.

Toru snorted. "Like you haven't made him cry – but don't worry, it'd be difficult _not_ to. He cries at the drop of a freakin' hat."

Taichi just continued glaring at him – even though it was kinda, well . . . _true_. Not that Yamato didn't have good reason to, but . . .

"What's happening?" another voice asked – a lot deeper, this time. It was their father.

"Yamato was annoying us so we put him in the dryer for a timeout," Toru replied. A different story.

Susumu walked past Toru and entered the laundry room – before backhanding Yamato across the face; namely his already injured eye. "The dryer's not a toy you little bitch," he spat, as Yamato started crying again.

Even Taichi had jumped a little in surprise at their father's strike – he hadn't seen that coming. The man standing before him was an entirely different person to the father who had taken him to the soccer match. He was actually a little stunned at the change – and a little scared, too.

"Don't annoy your brothers," Susumu spoke darkly, before turning on his heels and leaving. Even Toru looked a little ruffled; he glanced over at Taichi and gave him a half-shrug before leaving, too.

Taichi's attention then immediately turned to Yamato. He embraced him and stroked his back. "He's a jerk. Dad, I mean. No, both Dad and Toru. And the others. They're all jerks." Then he realised he hadn't been acting so hot towards him, either. He sighed. "And I'm a jerk, too. I'm sorry."

It took a while for Yamato's tears to stop flowing. When they did, he pushed himself away from Taichi's chest a little and looked up at him with red-rimmed eyes. "Taichi," he sniffled. "Do you . . . do you love me?"

"What?" Taichi asked, a little uncomfortable with the question. Yamato was looking at him intently with wide, enquiring eyes. He touched Yamato's bottom lip with his finger. "Yeah, of course," he murmured. Then he figured Yamato would actually want to hear him say it. "I love you, Yamato."

Yamato's lips curved into a small smile, and he laid his head against Taichi's chest. They elapsed into comfortable silence for a little while. Then, Yamato spoke up and said what he really wanted to say; what he really wanted Taichi to hear and understand.

"I'm not a toy, Taichi."

Taichi didn't answer; just looked confused as he waited for Yamato to continue.

"They hurt me . . . _you_ hurt me. I don't . . . I'm not a toy. OK?"

Taichi nodded, tightening his hold around Yamato. He liked having him in his arms.

"I'm a person . . . OK? I'm a person . . ."

What could he say?

"You're a person, Yamato."

He didn't realise he'd soon forget those words.

* * *

**End of Chapter**

* * *

. . . This was _a lot_ easier to write than XY for some reason. Perhaps it's the "sexing up" of XY that makes it harder for me to write? (Taichi: homgiwannabangyamatonosebleed.) XD;

Susumu is, like, deranged. XD; (Well, he's actually schizophrenic – but undiagnosed.) And Taichi was a bit of an arse in some parts – but he _is_ a bit of an arse so it's OK! :D XD; Well, he's not _super_ nice to Yamato because he's already seven – in about a year and a half/two years, he'll have turned on him (almost) completely. D:

This was more a collection of flashbacks that I tried to make feasible as an actual story, haha. And it skips around a bit towards the end because I didn't have the patience to write it out _s-l-o-w-l-y_ like with XY (where only four days have passed in four chapters? XD). But this is more like an add-on to XY so I guess that's OK. And at least it gets Hideki's character across better, I think? And WOW, Yamato actually has a personality! :3 (Which of course disappears as he gets beaten and raped into submission throughout the years. Yamato quite obviously has a severe personality change/block.)

**Well . . . make chibi Taichi and chibi Yamato happy and review, please? :3**

Notes on their characters:

I think Taichi's passable as a little rough and tumble kid who's a little confused with how Yamato is treated. I basically wanted to get across that he regards Yamato mostly like how any big brother would regard his little brother; a playmate whom he finds a little annoying at times. But added to the mix is of course the evident abuse – the _power_. It's commonplace to him, and as he's the bossy type anyway, he's a little _prone_ to exercise power over Yamato or bend certain situations to his liking (because what he does isn't as bad as what the others do).

Yamato was a little harder to write. I've always thought he would've been a sociable and well-liked kid (because he _was_ given the Crest of Friendship), but the divorce made him withdraw into himself (luckily he gets some of his old self back; almost every Japanese description of Yamato notes how popular and well-liked by girls he is ^^;). I'm playing the same card here – only his life starts off right away with mental and physical abuse. What that leaves is his being social around Taichi – and withdrawn and mostly silent and/or hesitant around everyone else (schoolkids included). But seeing as he's just barely six, he still tries to attempt to "please" the rest of the brothers (to get them to like him).

If I do write more chapters, hopefully Yamato's transformation into a mute, selfless teenager will make sense. Taichi is his ONLY form of confidence; when he loses Taichi, he basically has nothing. And once the sexual abuse starts (and as he ages), he "realises" what his brothers see him as – and takes what they see as truth; like he's been living in a world of delusions, and then BAM, it hits him that he's this dreadful person (though we know he's not).

Well, that's the way I see it, anyway. D:


	2. November 1994

:3

So, I wrote the first chapter back in 2009 before I even thought about applying for university – and now I'm almost finished university. Wow. Time flies. :3

I appreciate all your reviews and it makes me so happy that there are people who are as invested in the **XY** story as I am. :) Thank you so much – I love hearing all your thoughts! :)

But I have to take back what I said in my previous author's note: you _need_ to read XY to even remotely find this interesting, haha. Because it's basically just 'filler' to give XY more history (. . . plus I adore little kids). ^^;

Oh, and I don't like original characters either – except my own, which I think is how every writer feels about their original characters, haha. So thanks to everyone who has enjoyed reading XY: Beginnings and XY even though they're filled with original characters. :)

(Ages in this chapter for reference: Yamato - 6. Taichi - 7. Eito - 9. Toru - 12. Hideki - 17.)

* * *

**XY: Beginnings  
**_chapter two_

* * *

Taichi let out a groan as the dinosaur he was riding on was suddenly surrounded by water that seemingly came from out of nowhere.

"Great," the brunet muttered to himself as he watched the water rise higher and higher; it reached his toes, then engulfed his foot, and then his legs . . .

It occurred to him that it didn't even make sense – where had the flood come from? But he needed to get out of there – the water was up to his waist now.

"Stop!" a small voice suddenly cried out.

Taichi looked around quickly in surprise and tried to locate the source of the voice – but there was no one in sight. He frowned. But the voice had sounded familiar though . . .

_Yamato?_

And then Taichi opened his eyes.

"Huh . . ." came the brunet's own sleepy voice, as he tried to make sense of where he was.

It was dark. He couldn't see a thing. But – he could feel a dampness below his waist . . .

Taichi groaned loudly as his hands felt around the wet patch he was evidently lying in, realising now that he had just woken up from a dream – thanks to Yamato, who was next to him shaking and murmuring in his sleep.

The brunet sat up and leaned over across Yamato to turn on the bedside lamp, before shaking the blond awake.

"Yamato, wake up!" Taichi grumbled. He did _not_ appreciate being peed on.

Yamato's eyes shot open in a panic, before settling on Taichi and calming down. ". . . I had a nightmare," he told Taichi, his eyes still wide.

"Yeah, and you wet my bed, you idiot!" Taichi told him, a glare fixed on his face. "And my leg!"

Yamato immediately sat up after being told this, and looked down at the sheets around his body. They were wet; Taichi was telling the truth. His face fell. "I'm sorry . . ." he said miserably. He'd been having a nightmare about their father – his eyes went wide again. "Daddy's going to be mad . . ."

Taichi knew that was true, but he chose not to comment on it for the moment, taking pity on the blond. "Come on," he said instead, pulling the covers off both of them. "Let's go get cleaned up."

He grabbed Yamato's hand and led him to the bathroom, where he and Yamato stripped and quickly washed themselves in the bathtub with just water. After that they quickly scurried back to their bedroom to get dressed in new clothes.

Once done, they both looked at the imperfect wet circle on Taichi's bed.

". . . We have to tell Daddy now," Yamato piped up sadly, not looking forward to it. "He's gonna hit me . . ."

But Taichi shook his head – he had come up with an idea. "We don't have to tell Dad," he told Yamato. "I'll wake up Hideki and say it was me."

Yamato's eyes widened. "But Taichi, _you'll_ get into trouble . . .!"

Taichi shrugged nonchalantly. "Hideki might be a little mad at me, yeah. But I don't think he'll hit me . . ." The thought that Hideki would hit him was completely foreign to Taichi.

Yamato bit his bottom lip – he actually wouldn't _mind_ if Taichi took the blame for him, but at the same time, he knew it was unfair. And so he voiced it. "But it wouldn't be fair for you to get in trouble for something I did . . ." His face showed worry. "And what if Daddy or Hideki find out it was really me? They'll be even more mad . . ."

"It'll be fine," Taichi insisted, brushing him off. "They're not going to find out unless you wussy out and tell them yourself, Yamato."

Yamato frowned at the insult. "I'm not a wuss!"

"Then prove it," Taichi challenged with a slight smirk on his face, because he'd just cornered Yamato into doing what he'd proposed. "I'll take the blame, OK?"

Yamato still didn't totally like the idea, but Taichi _was_ doing him a big favour. He nodded his head in defeat. "OK . . ." he agreed.

Taichi gave him a giant grin – and in the process showed the rather large gap his two front teeth had left behind after recently falling out. "That's what big brothers are for," Taichi told him. "And you owe me, all right?"

Yamato giggled at the goofy sight of Taichi and his missing teeth, and couldn't help smiling back at him. "All right."

Taichi smiled. "OK, I'm going to wake up Hideki now. Get into your bed and look asleep."

Yamato nodded his head hesitantly and climbed onto his bed and under his covers. He looked at his brother and, softly, said, "Thanks, Taichi."

Taichi grinned before leaving their bedroom and making his way to their eldest brother's room. Once there, he knocked softly before opening the door and letting light from the hallway illuminate the way to Hideki's bed.

"Hideki," Taichi said in a whisper, as he tugged at Hideki's shoulder to wake him up.

Hideki groaned and opened a bleary eye. Upon seeing Taichi, he sat up slowly and looked at the clock on his bedside table: 4:07 am. He looked back at Taichi. "What is it?" he asked in a slightly annoyed tone – he'd had no intention of waking up at 4 am.

"I wet my bed," Taichi told him matter-of-factly.

"What?" Hideki frowned, rubbing sleep out of his eyes before his vision readjusted to his little brother again. "You wet the bed?" he asked, as if his brain was too tired to process the information. Taichi nodded. Hideki frowned again. "You haven't wet the bed in ages . . ."

"Yeah, I know," Taichi replied. "But I was dreaming about . . . swimming – and somehow I wet the bed."

". . . Right," Hideki said, yawning. He then got up and headed towards Taichi's bedroom, with the younger brunet following close behind.

Hideki turned on the bedroom lights, allowing his eyes to take in the sight of Taichi's bed with a glaring wet spot on the mattress. He then looked over at Yamato's bed and found the blond sleeping soundly in it. He sighed.

"Taichi, go sleep in my bed," Hideki directed. "I'll be there after I finish cleaning up your mess."

Taichi nodded his head. "OK."

"Oh, and Taichi," Hideki added sternly. "Please don't make this a habit, OK? I don't want to be woken up at odd hours to clean your mattress and sheets every night from now on."

"I'll try not to," Taichi told his brother, making his way out. He hoped Yamato never wet his bed again, anyway. It was weird – Yamato had stopped wetting the bed a long while ago, so he didn't understand why the blond had started bed-wetting again. Did that ever happen to him or Toru or Eito? Taichi shrugged. Maybe Yamato just drank too much the previous night.

* * *

The following morning Yamato cried out with glee as he beat Taichi again in Mortal Kombat on the Super Nintendo.

"You're cheating," Taichi grumbled, annoyed that his little brother had managed to beat him so many times on _his_ gaming console.

"No I'm not," Yamato retorted, sticking his tongue out at him. "I'm just better than you."

"No," Taichi spat back, "you just have no idea what you're doing – you're just randomly pressing buttons like a spastic, making combos by accident." With that, he reached over and grabbed the second controller out of Yamato's hands.

"Hey!" Yamato cried out at the loss. He folded his arms with a pout. "You're just a sore loser, Taichi."

"You _cheated_," Taichi repeated with a glare. He turned the other way and offered the second controller to Eito. "Hey, vers' me?"

But the older brunet shook his head, thoroughly occupied with the new Game Boy he'd just gotten for his ninth birthday – which was today. "Play against the computer; maybe you'll actually win for once," Eito sniggered.

"Shut up," Taichi grumbled, placing the other controller down and proceeding to do what Eito had said anyway.

Yamato then crawled to the other side of Taichi to grab the second controller back, but Taichi snatched it up again just before he got hold of it.

"No fair!" Yamato exclaimed, pouting. "Let me play!"

"No, you'll just cheat again," Taichi told him, placing the controller in his lap.

Yamato was about to protest and continue arguing with him when Toru appeared with a bunch of his friends. The blond naturally clammed up at the presence of people – especially older boys – that he didn't know.

"Cool, a Super Nintendo!" one of the boys with Toru exclaimed, getting onto the floor to look at the console.

"It's mine," Taichi said proudly and matter-of-factly with a smug grin.

"And who are you?" the older boy asked.

"That's Taichi," Toru answered for him, then gestured at Eito as well. "And that's Eito, as some of you know. They're my puny little brothers." Eito looked up from his Game Boy just to give Toru the finger, which made Toru and his friends laugh.

"And the blond one?" another of Toru's friends asked, seeing as Toru had totally ignored the third kid's presence.

Toru looked down at Yamato with disdain. "He's just my dad's son," he told his friends flatly. Yamato shifted uncomfortably at his comment and avoided the older boys' gazes.

One of Toru's friends lifted an eyebrow. "So . . . that makes him your brother, right?"

"No, he's just my dad's son," Toru repeated coldly, confusing his friends. As an afterthought, and to change the topic, he added, "And he's a fag."

One of his friends laughed. "He's so little, how can you even tell?"

Toru smirked. "He chooses to be Princess Peach whenever he plays Mario Kart – he's such a little fag."

Yamato could feel his cheeks burn with embarrassment as Toru and his friends laughed at him, and he wanted to defend himself – but he was too intimidated to speak out to a group of older boys. And he didn't know what the word 'fag' meant anyway, so he didn't even know what he'd be defending himself from.

Apparently, Taichi was wondering the same thing.

"What's a fag?" the youngest brunet asked curiously. He wanted to know what they were calling Yamato.

"Gay, Taichi," Toru told him with an eye roll. "You know, when a boy likes a boy?"

"Oh," Taichi answered, apparently understanding. He looked over at Yamato and shrugged at him. Toru was just being an arse, as usual.

Yamato, however, did not understand. "But . . ." the blond spoke up hesitantly. "Taichi's a boy . . . and I like him . . ."

Toru and his friends burst out laughing, Eito smirked while still keeping his eyes on his Game Boy, and Taichi rolled his eyes.

"No, dipshit," Toru said. "It's when you want to be with another boy."

But Yamato was still confused. He didn't mind if he and Taichi stayed together forever . . . so how could being a 'fag' be something bad? He didn't ask, however – he didn't want them to laugh at him again.

"Anyway," Toru began, getting to the reason he and his friends had come up to the apartment in the first place. "Eito, want to play football with us? We're a man short."

Eito looked up from his Game Boy in surprise. Toru and his friends didn't usually let him play sports with them – especially football – because he was too 'small', so he jumped at the opportunity. "Yeah!"

Usually Taichi would ask if he could play too (even though he knew they'd say no), but he really didn't like football (it was too hard) so he didn't bother.

"Come on then," Toru said, already leading his friends out of the apartment. Eito quickly turned off his Game Boy and ran off after the older boys, leaving Taichi and Yamato alone in the living room.

"You're so stupid, Yamato," Taichi remarked once they were all gone. "Do you have to be so dumb?"

Yamato frowned in indignation. "You didn't know what that word meant either! Toru had to tell you."

"Yeah, but I understood his explanation," Taichi returned, his focus already back on the television screen and his game.

"Explain it to me then," Yamato told him, still frowning.

Taichi sighed, but answered him anyway. "It's like, instead of liking girls, you like boys. Get it?"

". . . Not really," Yamato said, unsure and frustrated. ". . . I don't like any girls . . ." he trailed off, thinking about the other kids in his kindergarten class. None of them liked him so he liked none of them either.

Taichi snorted – but then gave a small shrug of his shoulders, since it was no big deal. "I guess you're still too little. You'll like a girl when you get more grown up."

". . . Oh," Yamato said dumbly. Then, ". . . Do you like a girl?"

That made Taichi pause to think. Did he like any girls at school? He found all of them annoying, and . . . girly. He shrugged. "Some of them are OK, I guess." Though, really, he didn't like any of the girls in his grade . . .

He guessed he had some growing up to do, too.

* * *

"Five, four, three, two, one," Yamato counted backwards with his eyes closed. "Ready or not, here I come!" He opened his eyes just in time to see the tip of Taichi's hair disappear into . . . Toru's room.

Yamato frowned, but trudged forward towards Toru's room anyway. He stopped at his older brother's doorway, though; he wasn't allowed in Toru's room . . . and Taichi knew it.

Taichi was sat smiling smugly on top of Toru's bed.

Yamato knew he had to catch his brother to win, but the brunet was cheating. "I found you, Taichi," he declared in a slight whine.

"But you have to tag me," Taichi told him, still grinning.

"You know I'm not allowed in Toru's room," the blond glared at him. "Stop cheating, Taichi."

Taichi laughed at him. "This is payback. Why don't you stop being such a wuss and just come in and tag me? Toru's not here anyway. He won't find out."

Yamato looked down at the invisible line at his feet that signalled the beginning of Toru's bedroom. Toru _wasn't_ here, so he was a little tempted to just walk in . . . especially seeing as Taichi had called him a wuss.

But the rule was that he wasn't allowed in Toru's room.

After it was clear Yamato wasn't going in, Taichi blew air and hopped off Toru's bed. "I knew you wouldn't, baby."

"You're no fun to play with," Yamato sulked in return, watching as Taichi began snooping around in Toru's room. The brunet had bent down to crawl under their older brother's bed.

"Too bad I'm the only friend you have," Taichi returned, grabbing a magazine before crawling back out from under Toru's bed with it in hand.

The statement was true – Taichi _was_ Yamato's only friend and, really, since he was his brother he didn't really count – but it still hurt the blond, although Taichi didn't seem to realise it as his attention was occupied with the magazine.

"Gross!" Taichi exclaimed suddenly after opening the magazine to a page. "Yamato, come look at this – girl parts are disgusting!"

But Yamato stayed in the doorway, frowning. "I'm not going in, Taichi. And stop touching Toru's stuff, he'll notice –"

Yamato's speech was cut short and instead was replaced with the sound of choking. Taichi looked up from the magazine to find Toru behind Yamato, with an arm clenched around the blond's throat.

Taichi got to his feet at once, dropping the magazine to the ground. "Toru, let him go!" he yelled at his brother in anger.

But Toru ignored Taichi. "What the fuck are you doing in my room?" the older brunet instead growled into Yamato's ear after he lifted the blond up with the same arm that was constricting his airflow.

Taichi rushed forward and punched Toru in the leg in an attempt to make him release Yamato, but when that didn't seem to have an effect he proceeded to bite his older brother in the thigh instead.

"Fuck!" Toru yelled out, releasing his hold on Yamato and rubbing his thigh where Taichi had bit him. "Are you insane!?" he asked the younger brunet. The bite hadn't actually hurt all that much (because Taichi had the teeth of a seven-year-old – of which he was missing several of them), and had surprised him more than anything – but still.

Taichi was situated between Toru and Yamato as he patted the blond's back, who was coughing repeatedly to breathe in air. Taichi craned his neck a little to look up at Toru. "He wasn't even in your room," he glared at him.

"Uh, yeah he was," Toru snorted, narrowing his eyes at Taichi. "And so were you. What were you doing?" His eyes then landed on the porn magazine that lay open on his floor, and he promptly rushed inside to pick it up. "You're not supposed to be looking at this!" he reprimanded Taichi.

"I don't want to look at it!" Taichi retorted, as he continued rubbing Yamato's back. "It's gross!"

Toru found himself smirking as he threw the magazine back under his bed. "You won't be saying that in five or ten years, ol' little one." Taichi glared at him for calling him little.

Yamato finally stopped coughing. "Toru, I'm sorry I was in your room," the blond spoke up, a little croaky, even though he technically hadn't been in Toru's room . . . but he'd made Toru angry, so he needed to apologise.

Toru looked at him coldly. "Whatever, dipshit – but if I catch you in here again you're dead meat. Got it?"

Yamato nodded his head – he definitely knew Toru wouldn't hesitate to hurt him. That fact was becoming more and more evident . . .

* * *

A couple of hours later the entire Yagami clan were at McDonald's in the local shopping mall. They were at the mall to buy Eito's surprise birthday gift, but Eito and Taichi were quick to point out that they wanted McDonald's – so there they were.

"Boys, tell Hideki what you want," Susumu told his sons as Hideki stood in line to be served.

Yamato tugged at his father's shirt. "Me too?" he asked with hope in his voice, although he was mostly used to not being allowed to eat when they were out. Sometimes, though, their father did let him . . .

But not this time.

"No," Susumu responded flatly.

Yamato looked up at his father with a sad face. "But Daddy, I'm hungry . . ." he tried.

"You can eat when we get back home," Susumu said in a no-nonsense drone.

Yamato sadly let it go, listening enviously as his brothers rattled off what they wanted to Hideki. A short moment later, Yamato was sat in his seat in a McDonald's booth, watching dejectedly as his father and brothers ate their meals.

Taichi, who was sitting next to him, tried to offer him a chip discreetly. "Here," the brunet said.

Yamato let out a small smile and reached for the chip – before Hideki's voice cut through the air.

"What do you think you're doing?" their eldest brother asked.

Yamato slowly retracted his hand, and stared down at the empty bit of table in front of him – everyone else had plenty of food in front of them, except him. He felt so left out.

"You're not one of us you know," Toru sneered at him. "You don't belong."

Yamato lifted his head to look across the table at his brother. "What do you mean?" he asked uncertainly, feeling hurt.

Toru finished a chip then leered at Yamato, before giving him a lazy smirk. "You're adopted." Eito let out a small laugh.

Yamato didn't know what that meant, and so he asked, "What does that mean?"

Toru snorted. "It means Dad's not really your dad and you're not really a part of this family. Your real family didn't want you so they gave you up for adoption, and Dad was kind enough to take you in."

Yamato looked sad and confused. "But . . . that's not true." He looked over at their father. "Is it Daddy?"

Susumu didn't seem to be listening however – or just didn't care, and continued eating his food without looking up.

"Of course it's true," Toru carried on, smirking. "Look at you. You don't look like any of us. Your hair's freakin' blond and your eyes are freakin' blue. People stare at you because you stick out like a sore thumb when you're with us."

Yamato looked crestfallen. He looked over at Taichi for reassurance – but the brunet looked a little uncertain too, and didn't say anything. Taichi had always found it odd that Yamato didn't look like any of them . . .

Yamato looked back over at Toru. He wanted to say that his mother must've been blonde with blue eyes, but he knew from past experience that they never liked it when he brought up the topic of his mother. So he stayed silent.

"That's why Dad treats you differently," Toru went on, sneering. "You're not his _real_ son."

Yamato didn't want to believe what Toru was saying, but everything he said actually made sense . . . He looked back over at his father worriedly. "Daddy?" his voice hitched a little, as though he was about to cry any second now.

Toru and Eito exchanged amused looks.

Hideki wasn't really big on the idea of Yamato bursting into tears in public. He rolled his eyes. "You're not adopted, Yamato," he told the youngest. "Do you really think I'd take care of you if you were? Shit, no. I'd throw you out on the streets to die."

What Hideki had said really wasn't very nice – but it at least reassured Yamato that Toru was just lying to make him upset. And didn't what Hideki said mean that his oldest brother didn't want him to die?

Yamato had the slightest of smiles on his lips.

* * *

After their McDonald's lunch Hideki led them towards the destination for Eito's surprise birthday gift. Only, just before they reached it Taichi suddenly ran towards another destination.

"I want one!" Taichi said as he came to a stop in front of rows of coin-operated capsule toy vending machines. He walked to a Dragon Ball Z machine, and turned back towards the others who had followed the couple of feet after him. "Money!" he exclaimed at Hideki, holding out an expectant hand.

Hideki sighed and automatically reached into his jeans pocket for some coins.

Yamato hesitated for a second before piping up, "I want one too, please?" He'd asked with uncertainty and without demand, as opposed to Taichi, because he knew there was a low chance Hideki would actually give in to his request.

Hideki handed Taichi the required amount, but just gave Yamato a dull disparaging look. Yamato looked away in dejection as he watched Taichi insert money into the machine's coin slot.

"Hideki, it's just 200 yen," Susumu spoke up in his usual dead drone. Yamato looked up at their father in surprise, then glanced at his eldest brother to see if he'd listen to their father.

Hideki paused, before giving Yamato the money.

Yamato grinned. "Thanks!" he said, accepting the money and walking over to stand beside Taichi who had just twisted the dial. The capsule toy came out almost immediately, and Taichi grabbed it out of the compartment as Yamato wasted no time in inserting his own coins and twisting the dial.

Taichi opened his capsule toy and groaned. "I got Master Roshi." He frowned as he watched Yamato take his own capsule toy out of the compartment.

"Yay!" Yamato exclaimed, smiling as he opened his capsule toy. "I got Trunks!"

"I want Trunks," Taichi informed him – it was just natural for him to want to get his way. "Let's swap."

"No," was Yamato's natural quick and blunt reply to Taichi – then he remembered his father and elder brothers were present. His tone changed to that of uncertainty, and he said meekly, "I got him fairly, Taichi . . ."

"If Taichi wants it give it to him," Hideki told him flatly.

Yamato looked at him with a saddened expression.

"Nah," Taichi then said, realising that it would be bullying Yamato – and he really shouldn't do that, as the blond got bullied enough by the others. "Just let me get one more, Hideki?"

Hideki sighed once again and gave Taichi more coins, where the younger brunet quickly turned the dial on the same machine again.

"Yes, Goku!" Taichi exclaimed with glee.

"Hey," Yamato said, feeling a little gipped. "I want another one too . . ." He looked hopefully at Hideki.

Hideki looked at their father, who just nodded his head. Susumu must've been in a nice mood or something. Again, Hideki sighed and gave Yamato the coins, who grinned with joy.

Yamato walked past the Dragon Ball Z machine and a few others before coming to a stop at one with pictures of planes on them. There were people in the planes too though, so he wasn't sure if the toys would be of planes or people. "What does that say?" he asked, pointing to the text.

"Famous Airplanes of the World," Eito came up from behind him to read.

"So I get a plane, right? Not little people?"

Eito snorted. "Yeah, planes."

"Good." Yamato inserted the coins, twisted the dial, and took the resulting capsule toy from the compartment. He was ridiculously happy to find that he indeed got a toy plane.

"OK, now let's go," Hideki said with an eye roll, ushering them several feet until they stopped at . . .

The pet shop.

Eito and Yamato ran with excitement to the glass windows showcasing puppies in them; out of the brothers, the two of them were really big on animals.

"Eito," Hideki smiled at his brother, a hand on his shoulder, "happy birthday."

Eito turned around and looked at his oldest brother with slight confusion in his eyes. "What?" Hideki didn't mean but he was _hoping_ he meant . . . did he?

Hideki gestured towards the puppies with his chin. "Choose one. It's yours."

Eito's eyes lit up in shock. "Really?"

"Yeah," Hideki told him, grinning. Eito had been going on about wanting a dog for a year now, but he had always been against the idea because it would be tough having a dog in an apartment.

But the smile on his little brother's face was worth it.

All the boys got excited about the prospect of a dog, and Toru and Taichi began pointing out dogs Eito should choose. But eventually Eito settled on a tiny Cavalier King Charles Spaniel that was brown and white, so Hideki got a store employee to get the dog out for Eito to hold, and then went to the counter with their father and the employee to fill out the paperwork for the dog.

"Why don't you get a bigger dog?" Toru asked Eito, with a slight smirk. "Maybe it could _accidentally_ kill Yamato, like those freak dog accidents on the news." He sniggered.

Yamato was on his knees petting the dog with Eito. He wanted to tell Toru that was a hurtful thing to say, but as usual, kept his mouth shut.

"Nah, I like this one," Eito said, rubbing the dog's ears.

"So what are you going to name him?" Toru asked.

Eito paused, before shrugging. He didn't actually think Hideki would ever let him have a dog, so he'd never thought of a name before. "I don't know . . . I don't really have any ideas."

"You should name him Agumon!" Taichi piped up excitedly.

Eito raised an eyebrow. "What's an Agumon?"

"I don't know, but it sounds like a cool name, right?" Taichi said, grinning his toothless grin ear to ear.

"It sounds like a dumb name," Toru interjected, looking dubious. Taichi stuck his tongue out at him.

". . . How about Puppy?" Yamato offered softly, his hands still clutched around the small dog.

Toru snorted loudly. "You want to name the puppy . . . Puppy?" He looked at Yamato like he was retarded. "That's an even dumber name. What happens in a year when it grows up? Will his name change to Dog?"

Yamato just shrugged a little defensively, and focussed his attention back on rubbing the dog. He thought it was a cute name.

"It's all right, actually . . ." Eito began with a little shrug. He kind of thought it was cute, too – besides, Yamato was the only one who seemed to like animals as much as he did.

Toru snorted. "So your choices are Agumon or Puppy? Wow, tough choice, bro."

Eito just gave him a look, as if to challenge him. "Do you have a suggestion, then?"

"Yeah," Toru laughed. "Bitch."

Eito rolled his eyes, not amused at the insult towards his new dog. "It's a boy though."

"Whatever," Toru laughed. He really didn't care what Eito named his dumb dog.

Just then the dog began to lick Yamato all over his face, making the blond giggle. Eito couldn't help but smile. He'd decided on its name. It was obvious that Yamato was very taken with the canine – and also that it liked him back just as much, so . . .

"OK," Eito said, his decision made up. "His name is Puppy."

Yamato looked surprised that Eito had chosen his name for the puppy – but then smiled widely. "Yay!"

"What? No fair!" Taichi cried, a little insulted that his name wasn't chosen. "Why does Yamato get to name it?"

"It's better than Agumon and I can't think of anything else," Eito shrugged. Besides, Yamato obviously loved the dog more than Taichi did.

"Puppy's a stupid name," Taichi muttered, although he was actually kinda glad Eito had let Yamato name the dog – at least the blond could feel like he was being included in something for once.

* * *

Later that evening when they were back at home, Toru was preparing some dinner to go along with the birthday cake they had bought for Eito. Hideki was originally going to cook something, but Toru had insisted he wanted to contribute something for Eito's birthday. So there Toru was in the kitchen – but he wasn't alone.

Yamato stood next to the kitchen counter, making little engine noises as he played with his new capsule toys. Eito had wanted to be alone with Puppy in his room, so Yamato couldn't join him, and Taichi was playing Eito's Game Boy seeing as he had the chance to. So, Yamato had been left bored and alone, and decided to hang around Toru.

Though the blond didn't usually like being around Toru by himself, he figured it was 'safe' to be around him when he was busy cooking. He had always wanted to help his older brothers out in the kitchen too, so he was loitering around for the opportunity to help.

"Stop that," Toru told Yamato suddenly, obviously referring to the engine noises the blond was making. "It's annoying."

Yamato immediately did as he was told and placed the capsule toys on top of the kitchen counter. He blew up his cheeks for a few seconds – left, right, left, right – before blowing out air. "Can I help?" he spoke up quietly.

Toru quirked an eyebrow and looked at him derisively. "Like you can even reach anything, midget." Yamato looked downcast.

Then the water in the cooking pot boiled. Toru glanced at it – and grinned. He looked back over at Yamato.

"Actually, yeah, you can help me," he told the blond, holding out a wooden spoon towards him. "Here, put this in the sink for me."

Yamato eyed him a little suspiciously – because, well, Toru could just put it in the sink himself. But this was the first time Toru was letting him help in the kitchen, so he wasn't going to object – he always wanted to prove to his brothers that he _could_ be useful, then perhaps they'd start to like him a little more.

Yamato walked over to a smirking Toru and took the wooden spoon from him, before turning on his heels to walk over to the sink.

As soon as Yamato's back was turned to him, Toru grabbed the pot of boiling water – and deliberately poured its contents down the blond's back.

Yamato's resulting cries were loud enough to make everyone (well, minus their father) rush into the kitchen.

The scene that met Taichi's eyes consisted of Yamato writhing on the floor crying uncontrollably. Toru was stood before him with a cooking pot in his hand. Taichi would've thought his older brother had hit the blond with it if not for the fact that the back of Yamato's shirt was soaked through for some reason.

Hideki had rushed from his bedroom to the kitchen thinking that Taichi, or possibly Eito, had been hurt. Upon seeing Yamato on the ground however made his pulse calm down considerably. He could also see that Taichi and Eito were all right – they were stood still and in a little shock above Yamato.

Hideki made eye contact with Toru – who just had a smug look on his face – and shook his head at him a little; not that he cared, but Toru was being a little reckless. It was easy to deduce from the scene that Toru had poured hot water on Yamato.

Hideki quickly grabbed a kitchen towel and balled it up a little before bending down and stuffing it in Yamato's mouth – to get him to shut the hell up before the neighbours thought something was going on. He then ripped Yamato's wet T-shirt off and proceeded to pick him up and carry him to the bathroom, where he ran cold water in the bathtub and placed the blond's back directly under the tap as well. Yamato didn't stop crying and sobbing throughout the whole thing.

Hideki sighed. He'd have to get their father to drive them to the hospital.

* * *

Hideki knocked on his father's door and waited a couple of seconds before opening it. He found his father in bed, silent, and looking over at his beside drawer – or, more specifically, a photo on top of it which showed his parents, Susumu and Yuuko, on their wedding day.

Hideki approached his father cautiously. "Dad . . ." When his father didn't respond, Hideki went on. "Dad, Yamato needs to go to the hospital –"

"She was a journalist."

Hideki stopped, surprised. His father wasn't talking about his mother – and he almost never spoke about the _other_ woman . . .

"She was writing a story about the company," Susumu continued, still staring at the photo of himself and his late wife. "I showed her around and answered her questions."

Hideki swallowed a lump in his throat – full of worry . . . and anger. "Dad –" he tried again, only to be cut off once more.

"She was so gorgeous . . ."

Hideki had always known the indecency between his father and that woman to be a one night stand. But the way his father was talking . . .

"Dad, did you have an affair?" Hideki found himself asking in a low, unsteady voice.

Susumu turned his gaze away from the photo to look at his eldest son. "I loved your mother," he stated softly, as if dazed. "But I think I . . . I loved her too."

Hideki could feel his hands clench into tight fists. He did not want to hear this. "Dad," he repeated, trying to control his anger. "I need you to drive Yamato to the hospital. You know, the bastard child you made with _Natsuko_?" He'd only ever uttered her actual name a few times before.

Susumu seemed to come alive at that, snapping out of whatever state he was in. His face contorted into anger. "What did that fucking kid do?" he growled, getting to his feet.

Hideki knew his father wasn't . . . _right_, with the way he seemed to switch moods and personalities, but he liked him better when he was functioning and, well, hating Yamato. It was really the only bond he had left with his father – although he would always admire the man – the _family_ man – his father used to be, before he met . . . _her_.

* * *

Toru, Eito and Taichi sat around the kitchen table eating Eito's birthday cake in silence as they waited for Hideki, Yamato and their father to come home from the hospital. The incident with Toru and Yamato seemed to be affecting both Taichi and Eito, who had both been uncharacteristically silent the whole time.

Until Taichi finally decided to say something.

"You hurt him real bad this time, Toru," Taichi told his older brother softly with a worried frown. "He's never needed to go to the hospital before." Of course, he was talking about Yamato.

But Toru merely rolled his eyes. "Relax. The only reason Dad and Hideki took him to the hospital is because the doctors are closed."

Though that did make Taichi feel a little better, he was still upset at Toru. "You should stop hurting him so much," he told his older brother. "He's only little."

Toru laughed and quirked an amused eyebrow. "It was an accident," he grinned.

Taichi's eyes narrowed at the obvious lie. "No it wasn't."

Toru shrugged nonchalantly with a smirk. "Yeah, it wasn't."

"Why do you have to be so mean to him?" Taichi raised his voice. "He doesn't do anything to you."

Eito glanced up to look at Taichi, then Toru, then returned to concentrating on eating his piece of cake.

Toru was silent for a moment, his gaze holding on Taichi for a while, before shaking his head. "You're such a fucking kid."

"Yeah? I'm seven," Taichi told him aggressively. "What's your point?"

"My point is that's why you're so fucking dumb," Toru sneered. "Why don't you grow up, Taichi? Eito has."

Taichi glanced over at Eito, but his other brother remained silent and continued eating his cake, not wanting to be involved.

"Grow up?" Taichi asked, turning his attention back to Toru.

"Yeah," Toru replied. He stared hard at Taichi. "Do you wish Mum was here?"

Taichi was caught off-guard at that question. He thought about it. Their father wasn't really . . . _there_, and Hideki did everything for them. And though he'd never knew their mother, he definitely thought it would've been nice if she was still around. He nodded his head. "Yeah."

"Well let me tell you something Hideki thinks you're too young to know," Toru said in a rough tone. "When Yamato's slut of a mother dropped him here, Mum told Dad to give him up for adoption. You know, so he wouldn't have any ties with us at all and we could all pretend he didn't fucking exist because he'd grow up with another family.

"But Dad refused. So Mum . . . Mum died. But the point is – if Yamato _had_ been given up for adoption like Mum wanted, then Mum would still be here. You get it now?"

Eito got up suddenly and began clearing away some plates. Toru had such anger and pain in his eyes . . .

And, rather unfortunately for Yamato, Taichi _did_ get it . . .

* * *

Later that night Taichi closed the door behind him as he entered his and Yamato's bedroom. The blond was home from his trip to the hospital emergency room and was now lying on his own bed, flat on his stomach. He had bandages wrapped around his back.

Taichi approached him and asked tentatively, "Did it hurt?"

Yamato gave him a look that clearly said 'well, duh'. Taichi was going to say something back as a retort, but decided to let it go. Instead, he sat down on the foot of Yamato's bed, seeing as his own bed's mattress was still drying from being cleaned of the blond's urine.

"Hideki says you're going to be all right," Taichi told him, looking at the back of Yamato's head seeing as the blond had turned his face down into his pillow. "So that's good."

Yamato didn't respond, but clutched his pillow a little tighter. What Toru did to him had _really_ hurt . . . and Taichi had no idea what the pain felt like – or what any pain felt like, really. Yamato could feel his eyes tearing up a little again at the thought of his brothers treating him differently – and badly – for no reason.

Taichi didn't know what else to say. Before, Yamato used to cry and tell him how much it had hurt and Taichi would hug him and make things better. But nowadays, Yamato liked to go _really_ quiet on him afterwards.

"Yamato, Toru didn't mean to hurt you so much . . ." Taichi found himself saying – or, really, _lying_.

Silence.

"I . . . I hate them sometimes," Yamato whispered, as though he was afraid the other three might hear him.

Taichi paused in surprise. He wasn't sure how he felt about Yamato's admission – he was talking about his _brothers_ – and he remembered the conversation he'd had with Toru. Finally, he said, "Well you shouldn't. You're lucky Dad let you live here with us."

Yamato turned his head around a little to look at Taichi, confusion and hurt on his face. "But he's Daddy . . ." the blond said slowly. "He has to. That's what daddies do."

Taichi shook his head, feeling the need to inform Yamato of what he'd just learnt. "No, see, Toru told me," he said with an air of authority. "Dad didn't have to take you in – my mum didn't want him to. But he did anyway." He bit his lip a little, slightly hesitant. "So you owe him. And the others."

Yamato's eyebrows furrowed. He owed them? For what? He got up in a sitting position on his bed, so he could turn around and face Taichi properly. ". . . I'd rather be with my mummy anyway," he told the brunet, feeling hurt.

Taichi stared at him in surprise. Then – and he didn't know why exactly – he could feel himself get a little angry. "You don't even know who she is," he retorted jeeringly. "She could be a bad person."

"How?" Yamato's eyes were genuinely curious.

That stopped Taichi for a bit, because the only thing he could think of – well, their father and brothers were guilty of, too. ". . . She could hurt you all the time," he finally said. He avoided eye contact.

Yamato stared at his brother for a while, before lowering his gaze. "Toru and Hideki . . . and sometimes Eito . . . they hurt me," he whispered. "Are they bad people?"

Taichi found himself quick to answer this time. "No, they're not bad people," he snapped at the blond, raising his voice a little. He was suddenly feeling defensive of his brothers – and, for the first time, he realised he'd made a distinction between his _brothers_ and his _half brother_. There was a strange feeling brewing in his stomach.

Yamato's eyes continued to look confused – but also accusing. ". . . But they hurt me," he said softly, with a slight bite in his voice.

Taichi didn't really know what to say. "Well," he began, "because, sometimes, you deserve it." Yeah, that was the best he could think of.

Yamato looked really hurt now. ". . . How?" he asked, his voice trembling a little.

"I don't know, you just do!" Taichi shouted at him. The conversation was getting too uncomfortable for his liking – but at the same time, he needed Yamato to understand where his brothers were coming from. "You just annoy them sometimes, OK? You should try not to."

Yamato felt attacked. Did Taichi not know that he was _always_ thinking of how _not_ to annoy the others? Of ways he could get the others to actually _like_ him? To get them to _love_ him?

"Maybe I should just run away then!" the blond shouted, getting angry himself.

"Well maybe if you did Hideki and Toru and Eito and Dad wouldn't be so upset all the time," Taichi fired back.

Yamato's mouth opened in shock. ". . . Why are you being so mean to me?" he asked, his eyes getting more and more misty.

Taichi was slightly taken aback – and surprised at himself, too. "I'm not." He paused. "I'm just saying the truth . . . Toru says that if you had been given up for adoption then my mum would still be here."

Silence.

Yamato's eyes glistened with tears and his lips quivered. ". . . Do you think I should have been?"

Taichi didn't answer – because he didn't really know what his answer would have been.

* * *

**End of Chapter**

* * *

Aww, poor confused Taichi and poor hurt Yamato. I want to cuddle both of them. :3

I'm so sorry it took me quite a while to actually find time to start working on this - but yay, finally done! :) There's probably only going to be two or three more chapters to this as well.

An XY update will occur within the month – hopefully less! Help me light a fire under it by reviewing. ;)

I've recently finished all my on-campus uni classes and just have two more assignments to go before I'll be graduating in December with a degree in journalism. Pretty excited! (And it's my birthday next week.) ^_^

Thanks to everyone who has stuck by my stories – despite my rare updates – and still enjoy reading them. :)


End file.
